A couple of hours ago, Pentheus, the WK, the CK, and two of my close friends for almost 35 years, and I did the havdalah service that officially ends Shabbat (the Sabbath) and starts the new week. And, it has been quite a week. I haven't posted for 5 days, and I am sure I won't be able to catch up completely tonight, but I do want to write about what's been happening here.
It has been a week filled with some of the highest highs and, to be honest, some of the lowest lows. We've been here to celebrate the WK's becoming a Bar Mitzvah, the rite of passage for the WK into being a man in the Jewish religion. (To quote a good friend of mine whose Bar Mitzvah was three years ago, "Today I am a man. Tomorrow I go back to the 7th grade.") This week was the accumulation of many hours of practicing and learning Torah by the WK and arranging and organizing by Pentheus and me. The WK read from the Torah on Thursday morning with a small group of 35-40 family and friends, and then read some more Torah and Haftara this morning (Saturday) with the entire Shir Hadash community.
In Spring 2013, when the WK first asked Pentheus and me if he could have his Bar Mitzvah in Jerusalem at Shir Hadash, the synagogue we joined when we lived in Jerusalem for 5 months in 2012, we were thrilled he wanted to do it. Pentheus and I had talked about how great it would be but weren't sure if/how we should mention is to the WK. Luckily, the WK scooped us and we didn't have to decide!
As you can imagine, there was a lot of planning that went into the two services during which the WK read Torah, and the accompanying events (mainly a lot of eating!) for our family and friends with whom we were honored to share this simcha (happy event). Those of you who know me well know that I am a planner - I don't like to wait until the last minute to do things. I like to make lots of "to do" lists (and check things off those lists) and plan things in a meticulous, organized way. Not possible when dealing with Israel and Israelis. Seriously, NOT possible. Whenever we tried to formalize anything, everyone we contacted in Jerusalem kept saying, "Ahl t'dagi. Aha t'dagi." (Don't worry, don't worry.) Sure, we had contacted some of the vendors we wanted to use for the celebration (see previous blog post http://divreiwek.blogspot.co.il/2014/08/shabbat-and-amazing-riba-jam.html) - for example, I had spoken to Sharon at the Café where we held the brunch on Thursday, and we had emailed a couple of times, but all we had determined was that the brunch would be on Thursday, April 16 and that the WK wanted to make sure Katamon Hayeshana Café had the food the WK liked. Ahni d'ahgtee, ahni memash d'aahgti. (I worried, I really worried.) It wasn't until Tuesday morning when we met with Sharon that we discussed menu items. Sharon appropriately suggested that we serve more than toast and jam because "Anasheem oolai rotzeem yotair me rak lechem l'echol" ("people might want more to eat than just bread.") It wasn't until that morning that the cost of the brunch came up - we didn't have a contract to sign, there was no deposit to reserve the café, etc. Kacha zeh b'aretz (That's how it is in Israel.)
So Tuesday morning, Pentheus and I met with Sharon at the Café. Following that meeting, we went to Rabbi Pear's house to speak with him and finalize details about the service. Rabbi Pear is one of the reasons we liked Shir Hadash so much. The WK was a key participant in the meeting; both we and Rabbi Pear strongly believed that this is the WK's Bar Mitzvah, and the WK gets as much input as anyone. While we were leaving Rabbi Pear's, my cell phone rang - it was the caterer for the luncheon following the service on Shabbat. For the first time, we talked about what we might serve as the menu and the cost of the meal. Again, there had been no discussion about payment, a deposit to reserve the staff, or a contract. In fact, because on Shabbat business is not supposed to be conducted, we haven't paid yet for today's event! I had asked the caterer about this on Tuesday, and he suggested I just call him on Sunday (tomorrow) or Monday, and I could pay over the phone using a credit card. Five minutes later, the photographer called to finalize details for Thursday morning, and I had already spoken to the videographer earlier the previous day. It felt great to have so many of the details nailed down. It helped calm me down considerably.
The rest of Tuesday was "Yom CK" (the day of the CK). It has been hard for the CK for the past several months because at times it has seemed to be all about the WK - getting excited about the Bar Mitzvah in Jerusalem and all that it entailed - not just the WK studying with his Bar Mitzvah tutor or the vendors for the events, but everything, including booking plane tickets for us to go to Israel, finding and securing an apartment where we are staying in Jerusalem, invitations, planning the services, etc. Plus, the demands of our daily lives of work and school and everything else that keeps us busy in Cambridge. We know that the CK got shafted a bit in terms of attention from us and the focus wasn't much on the CK. Accordingly, Pentheus had the fabulous idea that while we were in Israel, there would be a Yom CK - a day to do what the CK wanted to do, eat where the CK wanted to eat. Unfortunately, some of the Yom CK events had to be modified for reasons beyond our control. For instance, the CK had wanted to play miniature golf, but the mini golf where we went many times in 2012 is now permanently closed. The CK was a good sport about it, and our family went bowling instead! But, we did do lots of things the CK wanted, like take the public bus to the place where the mini golf had been, and buy several pounds of gummy candies to ship to Cambridge and to serve at the Bar Mitzvah today, and buy a soccer ball so that the WK and the CK could play at the park and go out to dinner and get to order fresh squeezed hot apple cider and to play on my phone for several hours. Tuesday night, one of my sisters and brother-in-law joined us at our dira in Jerusalem. They had been to Amsterdam for 3-4 days and then flown to Israel and been in Tel Aviv. It was great to have them with us.
(Yikes, it's almost midnight now, and I have to stop to get some sleep. I have only covered one day in this blog entry. There is definitely more to share. Stay tuned.)
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